Thursday, October 25, 2012

A cold day in October...

  Long overdue update on us. In May I finished my coursework, and last week I finished my written comprehensive examinations. I am not sure how I did, and will not know for probably a few more weeks. The good
news is, even if I failed one of the three sections, I will only have to repeat that section and “worst case scenario”(which is my way of coming to terms with the worst reality so that I don't worry as much), if I failed a portion, I doubt it would be all three parts. If and when I receive notification that I passed, I will meet with graders to learn of their comments and criticisms of my answers and schedule my orals. I have never known anyone to fail their orals in my program as they would not have passed you through writtens if they did not feel you could address their concerns in the oral examination. After orals, I will finish working on my dissertation proposal, which I am hoping won't take too long as I have spent quite of bit of time on it already. After submitting and defending my proposal, I will begin applying for jobs and finishing my dissertation. If everything goes smoothly (like it rarely does), I should graduate by December 2013. My program does not do a summer graduation, and there is a chance I could finish by May, but I am not sure if I will be able to defend by the cut-off for a May graduation. I am taking this week off of school work, as I am adjusting to teaching a night class intensive semester and trying to get caught up at work on research for this grant I am working on and have to get some things sent in by the end of this week for it. Also, my house is a mess, I am still going through kids clothes to see what they have outgrown and still need for colder weather, and I need to cook and freeze some meals to get us through the next few months as my freezer is getting bare! So much to do, but it is nice to have a change of pace where I actually feel I have time/energy to address these back burner things that have been worrying me from the perimeter.
        I think I am one of those parents that is guilty of saying whatever stage his/her kids are at is “my favorite stage”, but seriously, this is my favorite stage:) James is adjusting well to first grade. He has a really good teacher and seems to enjoy her class. He is very creative, and very sensitive—even though it is not always apparent that something upsets him. I love my conversations with him and listening to his opinions and gaining insight into how he sees the world. He is still in speech and language therapy, and I am starting to worry that his forgetfulness/inattention to detail will cause problems with his school work. He forgot to bring home his binder last night, at least once a week he forgets his homework, or the book he is supposed to read, etc. I am struggling to determine the best way to deal with this and his teacher has been supportive in trying to help him remember, etc. He is growing so tall and skinny. He can stand on his tiptoes and almost put both hands together behind my neck to hug me (and I am 5'7”). Even when I buy the slim fit pants, I have to buy the adjustable waist ones and adjust the down almost as small as they go. I recently discovered that he and I share a love for mint chocolate, which is honestly one of the first things we have in common! The girls do not like it, and I have long known their father does not like it and for that reason it is not often found in our house. I look forward to finding more ways to connect with him as I gain insight to him. He is the least like me personality-wise, and I
have the hardest time relating to him and understanding him. He and I are first/oldest children, but even there, we don't share many common personality traits. I love all three of them the same, and he seems to know how much I love him, although sometimes I worry the most about him feeling loved by me as communicating this to him is the hardest for both of us.
        Marion is still the child I see the most of me in, although she most definitly is no one but Mari! She and I have interesting conversations, because generally I not only understand how she arrived at that conclusion, but remember having similar conclusions as hers when I was her age. She is fiercely loyal and has a huge heart for others, but she also gets bored easily and when she is bored, she stirs up trouble. Her daddy and I often note that she is our hardest worker and seems to be blessed/cursed with my insatiable drive and need to be busy doing something, but Miss Marion is either working for you or against you, so our biggest parenting challenge with her is keeping her busy working for good and keeping her as far away from boredom/badness as possible. Apart from that, and her attitude, she is the easiest for me to understand and relate to. If anything though, perhaps, I put more on her than I do the other two. She does not always seem to happy with her place as middle child, which I worry about as well, although she loves her big brother and little sister fiercely! I remember four was a rough age for Jake as well, and I am hoping some of the fussiness and whining that goes along with this
stage will let up as she matures a little more over the next year.
        Alice is very happy in her role as baby of the family and as determined not to grow up as I am to keep her little as long as possible! While she often cries about not being old enough to take dance classes or play soccer, etc, she does not seem to find much benefit in not being a baby if she doesn't get all the “big kid” benefits. So far, there is no harm in this, and I am enjoying all the warm, snugly, baby  moments she can still give me. She does seem to be benefiting from language therapy, and, like her big brother, I suspect she might be left-handed. She is so quiet and sneaky that she often gets into trouble without us even realizing she is up to something. With Jake and Mari, we knew to worry (and still do) when they got suspiciously quiet, Ali is almost always quiet. James says she is always operating in stealth mode. She reminds me the most of Carrie and watching her and Mari playing together often reminds me of Carrie and I playing together. Ali was trying to “Shh” Mari the other day, and I told James about one of Carrie's first sayings was to tell me “You be shush”. She is more like her brother than her sister, personality wise, and looks-wise is the child who I think looks the most like me and my side of the family. All three of them are good mixes though, even Jake is finally starting to look like us!
        One of the reasons I have not posted in so long, apart from being so busy, is that it is a bit intimidating to try and get caught up on pictures. I made this video to reflect the two years that I have neglected to post to try and get caught up without inundating me with to much extra work and anyone still reading this with tons upon tons of picture update posts! I have missed blogging, but teaching online courses sort of takes the fun out of getting on the internet to do anything fun and it was all I could do some months to do fun things with my children and remember to take pictures in the process, much less get them uploaded and posted!